Enough Said...

Merry Christmas!

Apparently, the Japanese get started on holiday marketing even earlier than we do. I was told that maybe the store owners don't really know the significance of Christmas, but put the decorations on display simply because they are pretty and appealing. Sounds like America. ;)

This week was tiring. I got a lot of negative feedback from students (which is good...I ask for their advice so I can improve), so I've been self-conscious. Also, it has been cold and rainy. I've been feeling sick, and my mind is moving slowly. Come Wednesday, I just wanted to sleep after my busiest day of the week. A few weeks ago, I had told the chaplain I was interested in volunteer work in Osaka, and he told me that his brother-in-law works at a feeding center for the homeless on Wednesday nights, and invited me to go. Last week I simply never reported or investigated, so this week I knew I should at least show up to his office to arrange to go in the near future. However, when I opened the door, his face lit up and he said, "Ah! So you want to go tonight? Meet me here at 7." Don't you just hate when your manipulative plans are ruined by happy people?

Well, I was mad. I just wanted to sleep! My feet and nose and eyes and ears and throat hurt. But I showed up at 7. And I am really glad I did. I had an amazing time, as amazing as it can be while examining poverty in your neighborhood. The center is no bigger than a lounge in Minor (and much narrower). We crammed 10 or so bodies around a table, and got started making about 300 rice balls. One man said I was a very good rice ball maker, and would make a good Japanese mom anytime. Impossible, technically, but I appreciated the compliment. :) After an hour of dipping my hands in water, rubbing salt over them, and picking up steaming rice balls to pack tightly, my hands were raw but I was having fun (It was sort of like making snowballs, but a little more rice and a little less snow). We then packaged them up with a hard boiled egg and laid out some fleeces. After a tea break and some political discussions (I just ate pears and kept my mouth shut, obviously), we were ready to go.

We each took a discrete bag of food and a few jackets and went out around 9pm. Shops close around this time, so the homeless materialize from wherever they trekked during the day to set up camp on the sidewalks. Some had tents, some had tarps draped over a bike or a dumpster, some had cardboard boxes, and some simply curled up on the ground. I only saw one woman the entire night, but no one really had an explanation for me. Maybe, though, they were sleeping elsewhere. As we walked, the chaplain brought to my attention that many stores - though closed by 9 - still had a lamp on in the doorway or window. I had never really seen a red light district with my own eyes...

The food ran out far too soon, and I felt horrible as we approached a very populated area with only a few items left. The manner in which they are distributed is something we should imitate: you must get down to eye level with whomever you approach and say, "Dozo, konbanwa, daijobi desuka?" Mostly, no one replies. But occasionally, a man will light up and engage in a short conversation. One man told me "thank you" in English and seemed mighty proud of himself. :) Point being, the crew was very careful not to treat this like charity, but to instead approach each individual, ask how they are, and offer a treat. I know in general the Japanese way seems overly concerned with face-saving, but maybe in this case it is needed. We avoid eye contact. When we do help, we walk over and throw a quarter in a cup and walk away, proud. This group's method was so discrete, so sensitive. I felt like I was simply walking around and handing out treats to anyone I saw, not hunting out homeless to bring salvation.

At the end of the night, I felt bad because we hardly brushed the tip of the iceberg. The chaplain says that our area is the most concentrated in Japan because the government has programs here to help - like temp job placement or allowances - but because Osaka's economy is not very good right now, there aren't many jobs available. He said the homeless also find safety here. That's something you'd never hear in America. Anyway...I didn't really conclude anything about the economy or social system of Japan from that one experience, but I did conclude that I like the attitude that accompanies volunteering here. They didn't seem proud - like me - but simply like they were doing their job, doing what they were responsible for...Though I did catch one boy smiling an awful lot after handing out a few coats to especially cold men...how dare he! ;)

Manich Friday

Keiko
Chika




Yesterday was one of the craziest days so far, even though I only had 2 classes. Those two classes were my first adult education classes...and I was so nervous. First of all, the staff in charge speak very little English, so it was difficult to even prepare for the courses. Also, it poured all day which put a damper on my mood and seemed to make me late for everything. Also, because the courses are sponsored by the city, two representatives from the Ward's office (like our city halls) sat in for a bit and took pictures. On top of that pressure was the fact that 3 other OCC staff sat in (to support me, I guess, but it really just made me self-conscious).

The first class, beginners level, was great after all. I had been warned that they spoke little English, were scared, and probably wouldn't talk at first. However, they were great speakers (just needed a bit of prompting) and seemed really friendly and excited. Other than the fact that they are 10 older women, I kind of felt like I was teaching a kindergarten class that was pumped up for learning and excited about everything I said.

The second course, however, seemed scarier. It could be that it was much darker and rainier by the time it began, I was late because I was told the wrong building (turns out there is no basement in the library...just storage...oops), and the class was a bit more reserved. They were intermediate level, so they spoke better English, but they were also more confident in themselves, which means less reliant on me. They asked a lot of questions, but with a less childlike tone. They participated, but seemed too concerned with my judgment of their work. It felt like a serious college course where the students are educated, but much less enthusiastic by what I have to offer.

Again, the outside factors probably had a lot to do with it...but I definitely sensed a different atmosphere in each class. Either way, I survived! Then I took a long, deserved (I decided) nap.

That evening was the Cassie Welcome Party put on by the International Relations office and English Club. Turns out the party was more of a ceremony (I should have known!), but fun nonetheless. I gave a short slide show presentation of myself and took questions (most ended up being about Brian...), then participated in all sorts of Japanese games/traditions. I was the guest at a traditional tea ceremony put on by Chika and Yumi (on stage....in front of a crowd....that was bored watching some foreigner drink tea for 20 minutes, I bet). I got to dress up and mime Keiko perform kendo, Japanese fencing. I also learned about all sorts of Japanese toys from Miki, and I got to try them out (why does everything in this country have to be super advanced?! Don't they have bouncy balls??). I failed miserably in every case, but had fun. There was also food, but I hardly had a chance to eat. I must have taken 90 pictures....have to master my peace sign. That part was the best, I'd say, because the girls all approached me one on one and I felt like they were finally befriending me. They all promised to send me their pictures, so I will post them eventually.

It was a long day following an extremely long week, but I had fun and lived to tell about it.

[check out more pictures from the party on my photo blog]

I should be having a blast,

but I actually feel kind of blah. I guess that's not true. I meet new people and learn new Japanese and do new things everyday, but I feel unaffected. More to do with me than my environment. Maybe because it is coming at me so fast, but I can't take in much more or I have to push out the old. Like every new name I learn, I lose an old one. Every new word I learn, I forget another. Sensory overload...so my defense is to be comatose!

I think if I weren't broke (I haven't been paid yet, and I blew a lot of money on unexpected expenses up front) and if I knew a tiny bit more Japanese, I would be living it up in this city. Tennoji itself is amazing, and it's right out my door. But when I walk by concerts on the street, interesting smells coming from restaurants, or see cute little artists' shops, I have to keep walking because 1) I'm broke and 2) I don't even know how to ask how much things cost. Hint to those ever venturing overseas: learn the language from a native speaker, because CDs and books and English speaking teachers don't do it right. I thought I knew how to ask directions, but everyone looks at me like I'm crazy when I speak. Maybe the accent is wrong? Maybe it's too fast or too slow? Either way, I must not be saying it correctly.

I also am a bit down about some of the failed promises. I have no bike...I can borrow one from security if I'm feeling bold and if it's not after 5pm. There were a lot of costs I wasn't warned about - an $80 cell phone the school asked me to buy, health insurance costs (which I thought was free), etc. I also have no office computer, which is fine - I can bring my laptop. But I don't actually have a desk - it's a shared space. So I hang out in my apartment a lot, which they don't want me to do - they want me to spend time in the CALC lab so I can connect with the students (if I could just remember their names!).

Either way, I am feeling more and more settled everyday. I'm also getting more and more laid back every day (good or bad? I don't know...). If I get lost on the subway, oh well. If I am a few minutes late, it's okay. If I have no plans on Saturday or if I am sooo busy it hurts on Sunday, so be it. This could be because everyone here is so forgiving and gracious to foreigners. But it could also be because everyone here is in such a hurry that I already feel sluggish in comparison, so it's worsening naturally. This mean I will return to the states in a year either super fat, lazy, and apathetic or I will return 50 pounds lights, running everywhere with sore, tiny feet...

Anyway, I'm having a great time. I just wanted to record all the ups and downs honestly for anyone interested. I'm hoping as time goes by and I learn more Japanese, I won't feel completely zoned out in the city. Seriously...it's like walking through a movie on mute....with a really loud, distracting soundtrack...I know they are saying something. I know they are talking about things we talk about in our cities. I know they are eating and listening to music and buying clothes and getting on trains, but without understanding the language, I can't follow the plot. So I just listen to the loud music and keep walking. It's kind of fun sometimes, because I feel like I am a sociologist and this is my experiment. I can study everyone without them knowing it, because they can't understand me either. It's just that when I am tired from a long night class and just want to get home on the earliest train, I wish I knew how to ask which one it is.

Only 3 weeks??

Inside the home church...Meg, you like?

Our feast!




Today is my 3rd week anniversary in Osaka. I've experienced a lot already...homesickness, jet lag, awe, etc. This weekend was especially fun. Friday was pizza and movie night at the Parry's, and they bought white chocolate macadamia nut cookies. :-D Then Saturday I finally gave in a played with James...I forgot how fun Legos were! But seriously, I did experience Japan a little bit this weekend...

Today I went to Tomoko's church (in Totsuma's - another OCC staff- house). It was nice, and I had two personal translators...we had lunch afterward and I actually liked it (curry stew and rice maybe?). To top it off, it was the pastor's birthday so we had chocolate cake! Afterward, Tomoko wanted to introduce me to Johanna, another American from her church. Well, she is amazing and invited me to spend the day at her apartment. I met her roommate and friends, and we had a great meal and good time talking. Johanna and I swapped stories and talked about Christianity and evangelism here (or lack thereof). Dinner was Oden, a spicy winter stew that cooks in the middle of the table while everyone digs in together. I even ate soy beans and nattoo (so I can mark it off the list for good, right Kelly?).

When the ladies found out I was engaged, they made me tell the story. It made me miss Brian a lot...and this weekend was his birthday. It kind of scares me that all these things are going on at home and I don't know about them...people are going on with their normal lives, but I kind of imagined that they would pause while I was away. Johanna said she forgot about the term shotgun (she has been here 2.5 years) and who the president was...that scares me! I mean, I don't care about politics, but what if I forget birthdays and inside jokes and all that?

I don't have much time to mope...I begin teaching for real tomorrow. I am glad because it has been boring...I mostly eat junk food and watch tv (though my English choices are limited). So I am excited to get busy again. However, I am a little scared...I've always felt and looked so young that I'm afraid the girls won't respect me. And I'm even more afraid of my adult classes. I also talk like a New Yorker now, and need to slooooooow dooooown. There are just so many little things I should have been working on these 3 weeks, but now I'm out of time. Here goes nothing...

School of Models

Everyone here at OCC looks like they just stepped off the catwalk. I attended 3 classes today and repeated a game of introductions, and the entire time I was distracted by their style. Though every girl seemed like she had thrown on everything in her closet (cowgirl boots, knee high socks, tights, a mini skirt, 3 shirts, and 14 accessories), not one item appeared twice. So in three classes of ~25 girls, I think I saw more articles of clothing than I saw my entire Roberts career.

Anyway...fashion aside, today was great. Not all of the girls were friendly or curious, but most were. And of course, every class asked if I had a boyfriend, followed by "ooos" and "ahhhhs," followed by, "I am envious," or, "Does he have a friend?" Overall, today was not as embarrassing as I feared and got me pumped for tutoring and getting to know the girls better.

My favorite part of the day, however, was tea time with Tomoko. She spontaneously invited me for a date after reading my testimony for chapel (she is interpreting for me). I think she was more devastated than I am that my dad left our family, and wanted to talk about it. She bought us Starbucks' treats and made hot tea, and we chatted about dysfunctional families, my wedding, suicide rates in Japan, Christianity in Japan, and more. And as I left, she said "Goodbye my daughter!" She began working here right before I did, and I seriously can't imagine what this experience would be like if she weren't hired...she is definitely a Godsend (and I rarely consider people or events to be the will of God).

I will be heading to my first Japanese class tomorrow night, though this is really just an initial evaluation to determine which level I will be enrolled in (I could save them the trouble and just tell them "beginners," but it's important to follow protocol here...). I want to at least nail down my Katakana before then, but it is impossible! Advice: If you ever decide to move to Japan, learn Katakana before Hiragana. Despite what the experts say, Kelly and I agree that it is slightly more important to be able to buy food than to be able to spell out verb endings. I can't possibly focus on drinking if I can't distinguish juice from vinegar. ..